Saturday, May 1, 2010

Just Stop It


I need to stop, and think about what I am doing to myself. I would like someone to explain to me why my first thoughts of the day are put-downs, insults, and negativity towards myself? That same thought process seems to continue throughout the day. If you're anything like me, in a day I'm probably able to spot 100+ things that I do not like about myself, or would like to change. Most of those are physical. Yet actually coming up with the good things seems like a chore.

I know, I've tried. Occasionally a little voice in my head interrupts the insulting one, and says "Woah woah, how about you flip that, and try saying something nice?" Which I do, and for a fleeting moment I am happy I choose to say something nice instead of horrible. I decide right then and there that going forward THAT is how I will speak to myself. And I shit you not, five minutes later I'm back to picking on myself. Why?

Now, perhaps that's just because I have a goldfish memory and forget to be nice. But still, shouldn't that come naturally? Everyone knows that beating yourself down isn't going to do a damn thing except make you feel like crap. Plus, I know for a fact that when I'm feeling very upset I tend to eat - hoping that the feeling of being full somehow will fix the problem. Food is my comfort, I recognize that.

Anyway, I don't want to ramble on too much more, I just had these thoughts the second I woke up this morning and glanced at myself in a mirror.

2 comments:

  1. Becca... I totally understand what you are saying and how you're feeling. All you WANT to do is think good thoughts, yet those negative ones keep finding their way in and beating you up. I'm very much the same.
    I am constantly finding something wrong with myself, and comparing myself to others... Does this help me? No. I also am an emotional eater *sigh*.
    Good luck to you girly! We'll make it through:)
    Krista
    http://liveloverunthroughlife.blogspot.com/

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  2. Good luck to you too Krista! ~winks~
    I'm sure we'll make it through, with flying colours no less!

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